I usually don’t get too political. I more about issues than big government. But that said, my uncle forwarded this via e-mail, and I had to post it. As he says, ‘Leave it Robin Williams to say what needs to be said.’
I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I have not heard of a plan for peace. So, here’s one plan.
1. The US will apologize to the world for our “interference” in their affairs, past & present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, Tojo, Noriega, Milosovich and the rest of those good ol’ boys: We will never “interfere” again.
2. We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany, South Korea and the Philippines. They don’t want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No one sneaking through holes in the fence.
3. All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave. We’ll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of who or where they are. France would welcome them.
4. All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit. No one from a terrorist nation would be allowed in. If you don’t like it there, change it yourself and don’t hide here. Asylum would never be available to anyone. We don’t need any more cab drivers or 7-11 cashiers.
5. No “students” over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don’t attend classes, they get a “D” (for “deport”) and it’s back home baby.
6. The US will make a strong effort to become self-sufficient energy wise. This will include developing non-polluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while.
7. Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don’t like it, we go some place else. They can go somewhere else to sell their production. (About a week of the wells filling up the storage sites would be enough.)
8. If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not “interfere.” They can pray to Allah or whomever for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides, most of what we give them is stolen or given to the Army. The people who need it most get very little, if anything.
9. Ship the UN Headquarters to an isolated island some place. We don’t need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, the building would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.
10. All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way no one can call us “Ugly Americans” any longer. The language we speak is ENGLISH…..learn it…or LEAVE…
Now, ain’t that a winner of a plan. The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying “Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses.” She’s got a baseball bat and she’s yelling, “You want a piece of me?”
Update:It has been brought to my attention that the sarcasm in this piece might not be recognizable by many people. And so to be clear, I believe this piece points out the sad position that many in our nation would like to take on these issues. I believe America could be the kind of place that still accepts the worlds poor, tired and huddled masses… but instead she is becoming a world dominating consuming bully. I pray that I don’t take any of the attitudes, and publish this piece to put a mirror up to our face. God help us.